Do you ever come up with an idea for a story – either short or long form – and straight away you think of a million other things that are more pressing – like vacuuming the curtains – or instantly decide the idea is too stupid because it’s never been done before, or it’s just plain silly. I’ve been wanting to get back to writing. I don’t do it enough. Granted I’m writing agenda’s and marketing copy by the bushel load at work lately, but all the writing I do is just that. Work.

I’ve been trying to come up with ideas that have the legs to be written. Not ones that will hang around in my head for the next decade while I grow balder and fatter. I want an idea that is original and that works.

Recently I’ve been toying with the idea of writing an erotic novel. I don’t know why. Probably because all the queer-focused erotica I’ve bought on Google is written by women, and leaves me feeling inadequate in the trouser department.

Honestly ladies, let me tell you, the size you give the guys is probably why “internet” inches were born.

Anyway, I’ve been considering the idea, ignoring the idea, forgetting about the idea. Except it’s like a bad curry. The idea keeps repeating itself. Every time I turn around it’s there. Waving at me coyly as though it’s waiting for me to make the first move.

And it’s not just my idea. My twitter feed is riddled with erotica, and I’ve got no idea where it all came from. Straight erotica, gay erotica, lesbian erotica. You name it, it’s there. Not to mention I saw a link yesterday for parody erotica called 50 Shades of Silver.

I mean come on. I know I’m slow, but doesn’t that sound like a bit of overkill from the inspiring muse department? A few months ago I made an off the hand remark to a friend of mine about a character who had taken residence in my head. I mentioned he was a porn star and he appeared to be giving me the idea of writing a novel about his exploits. My friend – we’ll call her Kirsty – told  me my head is a scary place. I think she might be right.

Anyway, I’ve been ignoring my rather vocal character. I keep dismissing him and his story ideas as stupid, daft and wrong. I even found myself telling a friend – we’ll call this one Tony – about it the other week and while telling him about the idea informing him that I’d never write it because I didn’t want to become the “porn writer”.

I do love how my brain just automatically leaps to the conclusion that whatever I write I’ll become so damn famous I’ll be pigeon-holed instantly and never able to diversify my writing. Honestly, sometimes I’d like to give my head a kick in the bum.

So I’ve been ignoring my muse. This is never a good thing. This leads to crankiness and general sullen moods typical of an emo-teenager. Instead of trying I haven’t bothered.

When you get right down to it, being an “erotica” writer has worked out okay for the woman who wrote 50 Shades of Gray didn’t it.

A couple of nights ago I was on a website I’m a member of and I saw a banner ad down the side of the page. It was advertising the worlds first gay porn sitcom. Now I wasn’t willing to part with the $2.99 for a trial membership basically because the monthly subscription fees were not $2.99, but it caught my attention. Here was a porn studio, releasing a weekly episode of a sitcom that just happened to feature gay porn. It got me thinking. Maybe there was a way I could come up with a story that was different.

Obviously not a gay porn sitcom, but something that offered an original avenue for me to walk down with my randy porn character. At this point the idea is still very fresh – and still suffering from the instant Never Gonna Happen that plagues my head – and I’m not 100% certain whether I’m going to do it or not. But I’m going to give it a bash and see what happens.

My story idea isn’t the original one I had for this character, but if it works, I could have an original series of gay erotica on my hands. When my brain went into “seek and destroy” mode this morning it was met, not with meek acceptance like it usually is, but instead was met with a sassy retort by the character who then proceeded to turn up the volume on Kylie Minogues Greatest Hits.

I have to admit, I keep returning to this character because I like him. He’s fun. So I’m going to spend some time today writing a basic outline for the novel. I’m going to play around with the character a bit and see if this idea really does have the legs to stand on.

I’ll let you know if I have succeeded in writing the first in a series of Gay Erotic Mystery novels or not in a few months time. If nothing else I should be able to improve my writing simply by letting the character’s be themselves.