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My Week in a Nutshell 3D

3D Glasses sold seperately

Real World:

It’s been another quick week in my real world, day to day, earn a mung bean life. I’ve started a new Conference that has to be the most complicated program I’ve ever done. It’s the second year, but frankly that doesn’t make it any easier. Still it’s a successful event and if I pull it off I’ll be happy. It’s funny, but when I begin a new program I get consumed by it. It’s all I think about, I obsess over the way it’s written and who I will get to speak. I really don’t know why I get obsessed by it, nine time out of ten the presenters change my carefully worded agenda anyway.

My last program is currently on sale and over the last week has been sent out to over 75,000 industry professionals world wide. I guess that’ the joy of having 3 International guest speakers. I’ve never had international speakers on an event before, so I can’t say for certain. Either way I’m hopeful the event will be a successful. It was a labour of love – I’ve wanted this particular topic for a long time –  and being the Conference Director I finally had the power to make it happen. Now it’s a waiting game.

Online World:

I’ve continued my life in 1990 this week, avoiding social media as much as possible – which definitely is harder than it seems. I’ve been updating twitter, but Facebook not so much. I like twitter. I find it entertaining. Besides, as I wrote last week. I’ve trained my brain to think in 140 characters or less. Plus it’s fast.

Procrastination:

Talking of fast, I decided to put the “Less Then A Minute” anti-procrastination model into use yesterday. It’s strange. I really have no idea where I came up with it. It sort of sounds like my Grandmother when she used to tell me to do something. Anyway, the theory is, instead of waiting until a job is so big as to be daunting you do it straight away and it takes less then a minute. This works wonders for small tasks and as I discovered yesterday it’s not too hard to use for larger tasks as well. I wrote a blog about it yesterday, and it’s here if you want to read it Less Then A Minute

Alcohol:

Talking of my Grandmother I’m convinced she is behind the desire for me to quit drinking. Just because she’s been dead for about 5 years now doesn’t mean she’s still not telling us all what to do. Trust me. Since the day she died, our doorbell rings on its own. Not the normal ring either. Usually it goes “ding dong” when it rings on it’s own it sounds like Big Ben tolling the time. It’s no longer creepy, and it happens sporadically.

Anyway, back to why I think Lily is behind the “stop drinking before you kill yourself” theory. I was talking to my Aunt the other day. She’s my Grandmothers daughter. She called about a book that has been at the centre of a custody battle since I was about 10. I loaned it to her. She claims it was a gift. Anyway, the book got destroyed in a flood years ago and I’d forgotten all about it.

My Aunt is now on the internet and she called to tell me she’d found the book. I suggested I’d buy it for her for Christmas because it was either going to be that or a bottle of wine. My Aunt – like me – liked to drink. When I suggested the wine she told me she was no longer drinking as it was affecting her head. I mentioned that I wasn’t drinking anymore either – she hadn’t known – and asked when she stopped. Would you believe she quit drinking the same day I tipped all the wine in the house down the sink. I nearly fell over. It also convinced me that Lily was behind it. There’s no other reason why my Aunt would stop drinking let alone decide on the same day – and pretty much for the same reasons – I did.

Bodytrim:

Part of my attempt to clean up my life was to start Body Trim. I mentioned it last week. I’m two weeks into the program and after today’s weigh in I can say I’ve lost 6.5 kilos in two weeks. 4.5 the first week, 2 last week. Personally I’m blaming the double dipped chocolate comfort muffin for only losing 2 kilos. Did you know there’s 80 grams of Carbs in one of those things. I’m damned if I can tell how they fit 80 grams of carbohydrates into a muffin that can’t possibly weigh more than 80 grams. Those pre-packaged food guru’s are magicians I tell ya. Oh and by the way, protein bars taste like crap.

NaNoWriMoNervoBreakdowno Update:

So yesterday using the “less then a minute” anti-procrastination model I managed to accomplish everything I had set out to do over the long weekend in 2 hours between 6:25 and 8:15 yesterday morning. That left me with a long day to fill in. I set my creative juices to percolate and went to play on Twitter for a while. I had 2 idea’s I was considering, but I needed to narrow that down to one. I have a month to write a 60,000 word novel, not 100 words on 2 different ideas. I made my decision. The novel I’ll be working on is;

Divinity Inc:

Divinity Inc. is supposed to be a comedic fantasy novel set in the Principality of Dallensford. Dallensford is the home of the Divinity Inc prayer centre – think call centre – where a pantheon of Gods, answer prayers and perform miracles like a call centre does in answering billing enquiries.

The story is a coming of age tale centering around Simian Caldwell, a trainee-god who is currently in charge of making the sun rise and set and turning water into Vodka. While he’s still not very good at the whole miracle thing yet he’s trying.

Simian turns up to work one day and finds his job has been outsourced to a neighbouring country and he’s out of a job. Being a God – even a trainee one – is all well and good, but what does a God do when he has to get a real job? Given that Simian would prefer to be a member of the Party Planners Guild and organise weddings this seems as a good a time as any to try and make his dreams a reality.

As he tries to get into the Party Planners Guild he ends up in a job at Nirvana, the Nursing Home of the Gods, where he meets Head of Janitorial Services Thorn, who has been sentenced by Pernickius – his twin brother – to 1000 years of service for losing the Spanner of Retribution to Edgor  the Troll King in a rigged poker game.

Going off in search of the Spanner with Thorn, Simian makes a lot of discoveries about himself, comes face to face with his father and learns the only way to be truly happy is to be yourself, regardless of whether you’re a God or a just a skinny kid with dreams of silk bunting and centre pieces.

It’s all a bit up in the air at the moment, but for now, that’s the outline. I worked on it yesterday and I plan on working on it more today.

Butterfly:

For someone who believed he had the talent and creativity of a slipper I’ve definitely been writing a lot lately. My short script Butterfly will get it’s final edit completed today. I’m quite proud of it and really wish I hadn’t waited so long in my life to get myself moving. Still, maybe I’ll get it made one of these days. Either way, I’m proud of the fact I’ve written it. I’m pleased I haven’t given up on it and that I’ve worked hard purely because it sings to my soul.

That’s it for this edition of My Week in a Nutshell. I really need to learn how to put a cut in on this thing. Anyway care to show me?

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43 year old Australian writer currently working on the first of a planned three book Epic Fantasy series. When he's not writing policy discussions, or tales of swords, Gods, and magic, he can be found making a mess in the kitchen, and turning perfectly good ingredients into crimes against humanity.

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